Boxes, Darkness, Ashes.

Sunday, January 19, 2014

It's funny, I think.

How badly we search for and seek out positivity in our lives nowadays. 

'Be positive.'
'Look on the bright side.'
'It's all in your attitude.'

It feels as though that's all we're ever doing now. Joy and happiness are not things that come to us in simple experiences. Life has become such a challenge that we now have to actively seek out the joy in things. We read books and articles and attend seminars and search for answers about how to 'live in the moment' and 'be present', so that we can tune our minds to a frequency that endures the constant drone of misfortune happening around us. We're now seeking out lessons on how to be okay, happy even, despite what life hands us. 

Could be that we bring it on to ourselves, though. The misfortune. For instance, I find myself tangled up in my dark emotions more frequently than I would like. And I think I realize now that usually, in my moments of joy and laughter, I have managed to disentangle myself from the darkness, but rather than shove it into a box and lock it and burn it, I am in the habit of wearing the heavy coils of darkness around my neck. Winding it around and around, mistakenly believing that I'm in control of it. And there I place it, like a necklace, allowing it to sit and bask off of my victories, and letting it have access to my vulnerabilites too often. Not realizing that the whole time it is slowly creeping right back to my neck, lusting after the chokehold I allow it to have. 

Somebody slap me.
Hell, I'll slap myself. 

I'm stashing that nastiness into a box and burning it.

And then feeding the ashes to a unicorn. I hear those creatures have the ability to digest anything into a spray of glitter. 

Later folks. 

1 comment

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